Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I just had sex on a roof
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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