Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
