For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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