But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
