i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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