Just fell off a train. Bad.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
