But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
