yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
He has the fingertips of a God
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
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