You're so nebulous sometimes
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
It's blow job season.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
