that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Randomize
