seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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