I can tuck mytits in my pants
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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