i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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