You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
