and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
