Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
