I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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