his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
