I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I have feelings that need drinking.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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