my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize