When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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