im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
