So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
