My brain says no but my pants say off.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Hippo gnu deer
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Randomize
