To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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