the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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