Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
