So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
