ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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