That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
