remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Less talking, more tequila
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
