Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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