look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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