Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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