Your tits are I can't wait for
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
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