I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
