I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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