Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Don't make out with my wife yet
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
