Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
