I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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