Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
She bit a glass in half.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
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