I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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