are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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