sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
