gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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