I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
either way he was missing a nipple.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
