Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
