i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
