Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Randomize
