Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
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